Friday, November 23, 2012

radio silence, and a jar

Man, where have I been.  Parenting I guess.  It's been a busy busy time with two little ones about.  To be honest, a one year old and a three year old are a handful. However, we're still finding time to have fun (although, not so much time for crafts and mommy fun stuff).  I would like to post from the kids birthdays, and a few little knitting projects I have on the go, but today, what I am working on, is parenting.

We're at a point (with our three year old) where it seems that everything we say to him is either a threat or a bribe.  We can't just ask him to do anything, because he just won't listen if he doesn't have an incentive.  Whether it's something important, or something as simple as getting dressed.  Everyday, a battle.  The flip side to this is I just don't know which way to go with him.  I'm not opposed to changing my strategy.  I just don't know where to go.  He has grown into an extremely strong willed individual, so I never know whether I need to be more patient, or more strict.

In short, I've decided to try something different.  Not usually my style, but like I said, I'm willing to change.  Simply, we picked up a few packages of bingo chips and a jar.  Blue for good, and yellow for bad.  Every time he does something good, a blue one goes into the jar, and every time he misbehaves or doesn't listen, a yellow.  The idea is that we don't threaten with them, or bribe with them, they just happen.

"Time to get dressed bud," "No!" - Yellow.
"Please can I have some crackers?" "Sure thing, nice manners bud" - Blue

The point, is that when he then is asking for treats or to watch TV or something else special, we can look at the jar, and he knows that if there are more yellows than blues, the answer is going to be 'no'.

That's the general outline.  My other hope is that it will help us be more consistent, not having to always threaten things we don't really want to have to follow through with ("be good or we're going home" is the worst).  We've started this tonight (oh, and the jar gets emptied out in he evening, fresh start to every day) and hopefully it will last the week.

And on that note, I have a little hooligan to put to bed.  Night night.

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